cyber bullying – The Metrognome

Three Mumbaikars are teaching school children in the city and outside it to be safe and responsible on the Internet.

by Vrushali Lad | vrushali@themetrognome.in

Renuka Sharma (name changed) met a boy on Facebook and decided that she was in love with him. A few months later, the 16-year-old ran away from home to be with him. Fortunately for her, the boy, who did not know that she was a minor, did not take advantage of the girl; instead, he escorted her home and explained the entire situation to her distraught parents.

Most children are not as lucky. Drawn to social networking and gaming sites that also help them stay connected with their friends and strangers over chat windows, young children are increasingly falling prey to Internet predators, or being drawn into unsavoury bullying online. Often, unsure of how to deal with the situation, and afraid to talk to their parents for fear of censure or being misunderstood, they allow the problem to escalate out of hand.

All of this can be remedied by children knowing how to behave online. But who will teach them Internet etiquette, and what constitutes bad online behaviour?

Cybersmartie will.

Conceived in 2011 and set up in 2012 by three Mumbaikars – Shekhar Tripathi (24), Sayantan Sen (30) and Neha Doshi (37) – the company aims to educate children on responsible Internet behaviour, in an environment known to them (their school) and in a way that engages them. Speaking to The Metrognome, Neha (in pic on right) said, “The thing is, today’s children get access to the Internet at a really young age. Soon, they spend long hours online, signing up for Facebook or playing virtual reality games. There comes a stage when children find it difficult to differentiate between their real and virtual lives.”

The first problem area is cyber bullying, says Shekhar. “It starts off as a fun activity, with several children ganging up on one child. But it soon crosses acceptable limits of social behaviour. The interesting thing is, several children do not know that this is cyber bullying and that it is wrong,” he adds.

What Cybersmartie does is impart this knowledge in an interactive manner. “We hold workshops for four different topics – cyber bullying, digital responsibility – what to post and what not to post, sexting and online predators – and make them really interactive. We cite current examples when we speak to them; for instance, there is no point discussing what email is and what it means, because children today have email accounts only to sign in to Facebook. We talk about the technologies they use and address their online behaviour patterns, so that the workshop becomes relevant to them,” says Shekhar.

Why Cybersmartie?

Shekhar and Sayantan first decided to embark on this project after they accessed the latter’s nephew’s FB page in 2011. “There was a child with glasses who was being bullied online,” Shekhar remembers. “We saw that eight comments had been posted at 2 am. By the time we checked again at 8 am the next day, there were over 40 more comments, which meant the kids had been at it all night on a weekday. And the comments were mean and abusive.”

The two friends – they used to work together at at Pricewaterhouse Coopers – started researching this behaviour. “We learnt that it was called ‘cyber-bullying’ and that it could have far-reaching repercussions for the victim. We realised that nobody taught children about this, and there was no discussion on preventing it or dealing with it. Our schools, even our Government, does not have a policy on Internet bullying,” Shekhar (in pic on right) explains.

Neha came on board the project a bit later. “We met clinical psychologists, teachers and school principals to understand what schools needed. After researching and interacting with experts, we designed a curriculum for the workshops we would conduct,” Shekhar says. Their very first workshops happened at Lilavatibai Podar Senior Secondary School, Santacruz.

The workshops include a short video on cyber bullying, and the trio make sure to get the children to talk and share as much as possible. “They are very receptive and quick to share their experiences. However, when dealing with older kids, we engage in role playing and a quiz game-like scenario to first get them involved, then to get them to share,” says Neha.

Some problem areas

Most teachers are not even aware of their students’ Internet habits, says Neha, who is a teacher herself. “Which sites are the students accessing? When they say they are on Facebook, what are they doing on it? What is the communication like on Whatsapp? Teachers must be involved in these things, so as to be able to help a child who is being troubled by his peers or a predator,” she explains.

She adds that a lot of children operate multiple FB accounts, apart from posting such information about themselves that can be exploited by miscreants. “We teach them not to declare their holiday plans, or reveal their whereabouts all the time. If a child comes to us and tells us that he/she is facing a problem, and several children have already done so during the workshops, we take the problem to the school authorities so that it can be resolved.”

Shekhar adds, “We must update ourselves all the time, because cyber bullying may also change its form every three months. Besides, we must recognise and accept that children will be exposed to pornography and violence on the Internet, but that they should possess the knowledge to deal with bullies or tricksters.” He cites the example of a boy who befriended another ‘youngster’ – who was actually 30 years old – and soon began confiding everything to him on FB. “The man started blackmailing the child, and started extorting money from him. Finally, the child was forced to tell his mother when the man demanded Rs 20,000 from him. Children must be made aware that they should inform their parents or teachers at the first instance of such blackmail,” Shekhar says.

What they teach

The workshops deal with such topics as plagiarism and how to use others’ material for project work, how to use FB’s privacy settings, hacking, why passwords should not be shared and what to do when you’re being bullied, among other things. “We send a family ‘tip sheet’ after the workshops are over, for parents to look at. We have a module for teachers and schools too,” Shekhar says.

For more details on the Cybersmartie programme for school children, write to shekhar@cybersmartie.com or call at +91- 96193 22618.

Moving from armchair activism to armchair argumentativeness, we bared our souls on social networks, and hit back hard in disagreement.

by The Editors | editor@themetrognome.in

Part 10 of our Yearender Diaries

They say a society unites in times of collective crises. That crises struck us, again and again this year, and in several different forms, was a fact nobody could have missed even if they wished to. Corruption. Scams arising out of corruption. Dismaying crimes. Absurd arrests. Several freedoms curbed repeatedly. Apathy from the authorities in the face of demonstration. Forced imprisonment inside our homes as somebody’s funeral cortege passed through the city. Women being murdered inside their homes by building security men, or by men they knew.

And we protested in the best way we possibly could. We logged on to Twitter and Facebook.

We’ve been so good at protesting online, that we’ve actually assumed an entirely new social role on the Internet – we have a reputation on Twitter and Facebook, and we work really hard to cultivate that reputation and keep it consistent. If we’re a weepy kind of soul, we tell everybody on our friends list about our latest heartbreak (even if it’s a cooking disaster in the kitchen). If we’re the demonstrative kinds, we put up pictures of everything happening in our lives. If we’re the ‘keen, media professional types’, we demand that others put up pictures of everything happening in their lives, as proof that it happened at all.

And out of this last, arose the Trend Of The Year – general argumentativeness over social networks.

This was also the Year of Short Tempered Sniping. The moment somebody said something even remotely sensational or contrary, there were 99 people vehemently disagreeing with that person or calling him/her an ass, and one person demanding a Twitpic or it didn’t happen (this ‘How many snipers does it take to pull down a Tweeter?’ joke tells itself). If a stand up comic made a joke out a situation that saddened everyone else, everybody united to call that stand up comic a joke on humankind. If a celebrity died, everybody was supposed to say ‘RIP’, not ‘I’m so glad he’s finally dead.’ Any behaviour not adhering to these norms was swiftly censured and publicly humiliated.

It’s like we’ve forgotten the time when we weren’t so combative. When we actually took the time to understand a contrary point of view and have a healthy discussion about it. When we, even when we wondered if somebody was telling the truth, gave them the benefit of doubt and gossiped only amongst our friends. When we didn’t butt into conversations two other people were having, only to either say one or the other party was being really funny, or being an idiot. When we still had some manners and didn’t count the general mood of society through the number of ‘Likes’ on a page, or the numbers of Retweets. This year, we challenged others’ opinions with impunity, staunchly defended our own and demanded that others agree with us as well, besides ganging up against those whose words or actions did not fall in line with ours.

This year, we shot down the message, the messenger and everybody else in the vicinity. Then we sat back in our armchairs and felt morally superior, because we’d actually gone out there and ‘done’ something.

(Picture courtesy theaggressor.blogspot.com)

‘Diaries’ is a series of stories on one theme. The Yearender Diaries seek to capture the most telling moments, happenings and people in the city this year. Look out for Celebration of the Year tomorrow.