Category: Kharcha paani

Categories
Trends

Sweet khakras, anyone?

The ubiquitous khakras have found their way to the dessert section too. Is this just a fad or something more?
By Ritika Bhandari

Is this some kind of Willy Wonka trick? Who’s ever had khakras for dessert?!

My mum’s cousin believes that breakfast is only complete when you have finished it with a khakra spread with ghee. So much so, that for outstation tours, the dabba of khakra and ghee is always ready for him. As for me, give me a khakra spread with spicy seeng chutney, and I can have two of those for breakfast, lunch, dinner and midnight snacks.

Despite khakras being made at home daily, you will still find the majority of Marwaris’ and Gujaratis’ making a beeline for the methi khakras, the pav bhaji ones and the pani puri-flavoured khakras at the many farsan stores in Mumbai.

During one such sojourn to the khakra aisle, I chanced upon ‘Roasted Pepper Chocolate Khakra’ and the more fanciful ‘Roasted Pepper Vanilla Khakra’. While one was a chocolatey circle, the other was a white one. Not ready to try it, I searched for another food item to munch on. Yet, something about those two variants got me.

I needed to know if this was just tempered chocolate shaped like a khakra with a slight curve in the centre. Or was this really a genuine attempt to introduce this dish in the dessert arena? And within two hours of buying the whole packet, I knew. They were khakras for sure! The same thin, crunchy, crispy and unmistakable taste of a khakra infused with the lightest vanilla flavour. If your palate isn’t strong, you might just miss it.

But the chocolate khakras, they are worthy of their dark flavour. Just one bite and you want to eat more. The best part about these sweet khakras is their not-so-overwhelming taste and flavour. It does not reek of essence, as one would imagine.

So how do I make everyone eat them without making them look like khakras? Maybe cut triangular decorative pieces as a garnish for the chocolate mousse? Or maybe with some fruit on top, the roasted pepper chocolate and vanilla khakras can be a twist on the traditional nachos and dip dish. What do you think? Any Mumbai Willy Wonkas at hand?

 (Pictures courtesy www.thatsthesecretformula.blogspot.com, Ritika Bhandari)

Categories
Learn

A Superman even in death

Shafique Shaikh, the ‘Superman’ in ‘Malegaon ka Superman’, is the new poster boy for the Voice of Tobacco Victims campaign.
by The Diarist | thediarist@themetrognome.in

Some people inspire even in death. Shafique Shaikh (28), the actor who got rave reviews for his entertaining portrayal of Superman in the film Malegaon Ka Superman, died an untimely death last year after a battle with mouth cancer. However, he is now the poster boy for the ongoing Voice of Tobacco Victims, a country-wide campaign by doctors and victims of oral cancer caused by chewing tobacco.

The campaign yesterday released its new public awareness poster, featuring Shafique in his best-remembered Superman avatar. The poster attacks the gutka lobby, which it says is upset with the ban on sale of gutka in 14 states in India, of which Maharashtra was the first to implement the ban. The poster (see pic) displays Shafique and identifies him as a victim of gutka addiction, and states that 6.5 crore Indians like the late actor are slowly becoming cancer patients.

Speaking to The Metrognome, Dr Prakash Gupta, of the Mumbai-based Healis Sekhsaria Institute for Public Health (which launched the campaign) and who is affiliated with Action Council Against Tobacco India, said, “In the film, Shafique was shown fighting tobacco, but in real life, he lost the battle to cancer. His story inspired us to take the campaign forward and let more people know that an individual like him was also lost to the evil of gutka. Gutka manufacturers are asking if it is fair to ban gutka in 14 states when other substances causing addiction are still being sold. We ask: is it fair that crores of Indians are losing their lives due to cancer caused by gutka?”

The campaign was initiated in May 2008, and is the brainchild of Dr Pankaj Chaturvedi, who is an associate professor at Tata Memorial Hospital, Mumbai. The campaign is driven by victims of tobacco themselves, who the campaign projects as the face of its initiatives. “Our most notable success has been in getting gutka sale banned in 14 Indian states. We made representations to all major Parliamentarians, Chief Ministers of several states, such important politicians as Sushma Swaraj, and several Cabinet Ministers. However, we plan to use this latest poster to strengthen the Tobacco Control Policy in India,” Dr Gupta explained.

Know more about The Voices of Tobacco Victims campaign here. As of now, over 30 renowned cancer surgeons, doctors, about 30 institutions and tobacco victims from all across the country are an active part of the campaign. 

(Featured image courtesy newsbeats.in. Poster courtesy Healis Sekhsaria Institute of Public Health, Mumbai)

 

Categories
Learn

PETA had goats for dinner

The animal rights organisation threw a party for goats on Bakri Eid day. Meanwhile, the city celebrates with full gusto.
by The Diarist | thediarist@themetrognome.in

It’s the same story every single year. Goats and sheep are taken across the city to Muslim homes, where families eagerly await them every Bakri Eid day. But a recurring theme in the celebrations, is that the animals end up dead even before they are cut – many times during transport, at other times because they are artificially fattened up in a very short period of time, thus making them very ill.

A seller who spoke to us on condition of anonymity said, “Orders are increasing every year. Sometimes, we find that the animals don’t survive very long after selling. Some customers say that the animal was unconscious after the sale, others say that it couldn’t walk properly and kept collapsing.”

In the midst of this, animal rights champion People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) told The Metrognome that PETA had goats for dinner this year. In an email sent to us by Corporate and Government Affairs liaison, PETA India, Sarfaraz Syed said, “This Eid, PETA had goats for dinner, not as food but as the guests of honour. We urged people to join us in using this auspicious occasion to celebrate, not take, life and to give alms such as fruits, vegetables, breads and pulses to the people and animals who need it the most.

We’ve pushed the Ministry of Environment and Forests to ban all animal sacrifice in the country. As per the Slaughterhouse Rules, slaughter is supposed to happen in a licensed slaughterhouse, not on the streets. Most cases of sacrifice/slaughter are conducted in temples or on the roads, against the Rules.

We also have a case on in the Indian Supreme Court against year round illegal treatment of animals during transport and slaughter. Goats, buffaloes, sheep and other cattle are crammed onto vehicles on their way to slaughter in such high numbers that many break their bones and die en route. Those who survive are hacked to death with dull knives in full view of one another.

Our year round focus is on raising awareness on the benefits of going vegan for the animals, our health and the environment in a variety of ways so that it reaches the maximum number of people.”

 

Categories
Become

Writing from the heart and other great ideas

Her first book sold 50,000 copies and her second one’s just out. Madhuri Banerjee talks about putting herself out there.
by Vrushali Lad | vrushali@themetrognome.in

Madhuri Banerjee wrote her first novel, Losing My Virginity And Other Dumb Ideas, on a whim. “I had just had my baby and a 30-something friend was visiting me. While talking, she mentioned that she was still a virgin. That made me think a bit,” Madhuri says. Surprised at this information, and wondering if there were other such virgins around, she spoke to a few of her friends. “There were about three other women who said they were still virgins. “I wondered: what does a woman have to do to lose her virginity?”

And so Madhuri sat down in September 2008 and began to write. “I wrote one punchy chapter, then I showed it to my best friend, asking if she would like to read more. She said she was interested in reading further. I also showed it to my husband, who raised his eyebrows and said, ‘Chick lit?’” she laughs. “But when I said I was serious about writing this, he said, ‘Be the next Elizabeth Gilbert.’”

Since her baby was just three months old and her husband worked full-time, Madhuri could write only at night. “The story was already in my head, and I didn’t edit it as I wrote. I finally finished it in January 2009. Then I wondered how to send the book to publishers.”

Sending the manuscript: Her husband’s friend had been published by Penguin. “I sent my manuscript to that contact that the friend gave, and like an idiot, I sent the entire book at once, instead of just a synopsis and a sample chapter,” she grins. “I also enclosed a cover letter saying that I was a debut writer hoping to be a debut author. But I did not know that the woman I had sent out the book to was the Penguin CEO’s wife! And she got back to me in 48 hours!”

The publishers’ first feedback: “Heather, who I had sent the book to, said she loved it and that she would ask the relevant editor to contact me and that they would send me the contract. She ended by welcoming me to the Penguin family. I had goosebumps all over my body, and I stammered my thanks, hardly believing what I was hearing,” she says. The editor called a week later and things got underway. “I had also sent my book to Harper Collins, but I didn’t hear back from them and honestly, I didn’t care. My first book was about relationships and for me, relationships are far more important than business.”

The production process: “Penguin is extremely thorough with the editing process. My editor had skimmed through the book on her first read, then she read it thoroughly on her second read. The book then went through structural changes, grammatical errors were removed, there were some name changes as well. Yet another editor read sections of it, 30 pages at a time, and she was extremely thorough. She suggested several language changes, and she and I had several arguments about them. I accused her of having Jane Austen sensibilities, not letting me use words like ‘Ain’t,’, and she retorted that she was only trying to make it better!” Madhuri laughs. “But she really made me understand the editing process well.”

The jacket: Normally, Madhuri says, the publishers show you a jacket option “that they try to convince you is the best option.” Her book’s first cover had a picture of a balloon “with three things coming out of it. Given a choice, I would have loved a picture of water droplets and a rainbow and a girl standing at a window.” She adds, “It was very exciting. We sold 20,000 copies with that first cover. The second cover was very successful, everybody loved it. Usually, if the book falls in a particular category, like mine did (it was published by Penguin Metro Reads), the jacket design follows a set format.”

The launch: The book was launched at Penguin’s Spring Fest in March 2011, and had a Mumbai launch later, in which actor Gul Panag was the chief guest. “Gul said she’d be there only for a short while, then she spent three hours at the launch. It was great,” Madhuri says.

Sales: “The book has sold over 50,000 copies so far,” Madhuri says. “It is still selling, and I’m shocked that people are still reading it.” But what about the royalty factor, and is it true that first-time authors are paid a pittance as advance fees? “Yes, you make peanuts as a debut author. But you know, I spoke with Ashok Banker, and he said that he was paid very little by publishers for a long time before he was signed on with an eight-figure advance. It’s best to leave all that to the publishers, and write for yourself with all your heart.”

Authors can also make more money through translations of their work in other languages, like Madhuri is doing – her first book has now been translated in three Indian languages, and has been selected for an e-book version for Kindle.

Multiple book deals: Since the novel was a big success – in the Indian publishing scene, anything selling about 5,000 copies is considered a good break – Penguin handed Madhuri a two-book deal. This prompted a big rethink, because she hadn’t considered writing a sequel. “The publishers give you a deadline in which to finish each book, and mine was March 2012. The sequel was more difficult, because your characters had to have evolved, there had to be a whole new dimension to them and the plot. Plus, the scenes, the dialogues had to be more mature. I put more of myself in this book than the first,” she reveals.

Cruel feedback: How does she deal with criticism? “Very badly,” she giggles. “When I received the first emails really trashing my book, I cried for days. It still takes me an entire day to recover from nasty feedback. People really were cruel, some of them said the book was terrible, it should never have been printed, my writing was pathetic. I find it tough to deal with it, because I am passionate about every sentence I write. Every word I put down is me. And I don’t criticise another person’s creativity at all. Now I’ve taught myself not to imbibe the negativity. I rest peacefully, meditate and find a balance.”

Madhuri’s tips for aspiring authors:

– Know your work thoroughly. Go through it with a fine tooth comb, and be confident about your story. More importantly, live with it for some time.

– Be patient. Publishers have a huge workload and they may take time to evaluate your work. Be patient whether you receive an acceptance letter or a rejection email. If your work has been rejected, reevaluate it, rework it, give it a different title, send it out again.

– Be shameless about networking. Use your friends, their contacts, whoever you think will get you that foot in the door. Buy them a lavish dinner if you have to, just go out there and network.

Categories
Learn

When I met Gary and George

Our writer had a ringside view of Masterchef Australia’s Gary Mehigan and George Calombaris doing the judging – in Mumbai!
by Pooja Palani

“Indian food has still not made that niche that it deserves in Australia as yet. Indians should come up with more variety in their cooking internationally. There are very few famous Indian restaurants in Australia,” he said. Then he added, “I love the flavours in Indian food, I love the spices that dominate Indian recipes.  The only thing I miss in the Indian food we get in Australia is the ethnicity.”

I was speaking to Gary Mehigan. And George Calombaris. Of Masterchef Australia. In person. In Mumbai.

I was at an event where Gary and George were judges for food cooked by the Kohinoor International Management Institute’s School of Hospitality Management students, for the Oz fest conducted by the Australian consulate General Mumbai at Hotel Kohinoor Elite. The popular duo was more than friendly, and very encouraging of the food presented to them.

Admitting that they were “amazed” with the food put up for their judging, they spent a long while telling the students how to improve on certain aspects of their cooking. Given George’s track record of breaking into a big sweat when eating anything spicy, I waited to see how he would react to the tandoori chicken. But surprisingly, he was very happy with it, and when I suggested that he was probably ‘bazzled’ (his favourite word, that he uses freely on Masterchef Australia), he broke into laughter. “You’ve been watching the show!” he exclaimed.

When asked about their judging style on Masterchef, Gary said, “We don’t believe in de-motivating students by shouting and demoralising them, unlike other celebrity chefs like Gordon Ramsey.” Ouch.

The two also tried their hand at making naan in the hotel’s tandoor, apart from being very impressed with jalebis and rabri, which the students served for dessert. George even said he would include the dishes in his restaurant in Australia. I asked him about Matt Preston, the third portly component of their famous trio, and who is very familiar with Mumbai street food. “Yeah, I really miss him in today’s food fest,” he said.

A student asked about international audiences’ expectations of Indian food and how it should be presented. Gary simply said, “Be aesthetic and traditional. The food should be served and eaten the way it is traditionally done at home. There is no need to add frills and fancy to the dish if it doesn’t demand it,” here he picked up a drumstick wrapped in foil, considerately served that way so nobody would get their hands dirty. “The recipe should do the talking,” he said.

I wanted to know more about Indian influences on Australian food – which, curiously, is not an identifiable cuisine but a mix of several cultures – having been in Australia myself for a year. “India is an important trading partner for Australia, and there are many Indians living in Australia for several generations,” Gary explained. “But Australia is a multicultural country, it has a bit of an Indian influence in the cooking style. For example, the barbeque is very widely used to cook in Australia, as well as in India, but here you just call it a tandoor.” Both the men spoke at length about how Masterchef Australia had been a stepping stone for many of the Indian contestants who were in the show.

“It’s great, how we get to taste various cuisines. But Indian food should get more publicised in Australia, like the other Asian cuisines like Thai, Chinese and Vietnamese food. We want Indian street food to go international. I am a big fan of south Indian food and I wish they start dosa bars in my country,” said Gary. George, on the other hand, loves the buttery garlic naans and parathas.

George could barely contain his glee as he explained his tour itinerary. “We are very excited to try the street food of Mumbai and Delhi. I am waiting to have the chicken bhuna masala and the mutton seekh kebabs from Bademiya and Khan Baba’s,” he grinned. The media asked if they would be visiting again, to which both men said they would come whenever invited. “Follow us on Twitter, you can suggest great foodie joints for us!”George said. After Mumbai, the duo were set for a tour comprising Delhi and Bangalore as well.

Overall, I had the greatest time. And it was made all the more better when I smiled at George, and he winked at me!

(Pictures by Pooja Palani)

Categories
Become

‘Because I lack the discipline serial killing requires’

…is why Ashish Shakya does stand up comedy, and also because his comedy has gone ‘from sh*t to less sh*t’.
by The Editors | editor@themetrognome.in

Ashish Shakya is 28, and funny as hell.

He ‘mooned the college after he finished engineering studies.’ His first stand-up act ‘was the opposite of funny and smart’. He kept going at stand-up comedy till he ‘went from shit to less shit’. And, he says, ‘as a comic, all you can do is put in every bit of energy and talent that you have, take your money and go home feeling a little bit like a whore.’

In a hilarious interview, the Bandra resident tells The Metrognome about his chosen profession, performing to stony silences, writing funny stuff every week for television and what aspiring stand-up comics and humour writers need to consider before taking the plunge into the business of comedy.

When did you first realise you were funny, that you had the ability to get a laugh? Was there a moment of epiphany?

There is no real single instance that served as an epiphany. At some point, you just develop some sort of a personality, and mine turned out to be the guy that was probably dropped on his head as a kid, making sure he’d never have anything close to a normal thought process. As such, the choice is between comedy and serial killing. I do the former because I lack the discipline that serial-killing requires.

And yes, I imagine that my parents were my first audience, although kids say stupid things that parents laugh at because they have to. If I was in their place, I would ask for a refund.

You studied engineering. What did you do after you finished college?

Mooned the college and thanked the universe that it was over. Drank a lot. Also, started working with a youth magazine called JAM about a week after my final exams, because, well, I needed to make up for lost time.

How has your educational background as an engineer helped your sense of humour? And why are there so many engineers in the media?

I had lots of free time in engineering college, since I didn’t really bother with all that pesky studying nonsense. That free time may have helped warp my mind a fair bit, and that’s always a good thing for comedy. As far as the glut of engineers in the media (or even other non-tech fields) is concerned, it’s probably because engineering is the default option for most kids in India. It’s also easy to get into. But the blinkers come off once you’re in college and by then it’s too late, so you just sit around, biding your time until one day, you’re free AND CAN DO WHATEVER THE F**K YOU WANT BECAUSE YOU’RE YOUNG AND FOOLISH WOOHOO!

 When did you first start writing? What was it about?

I started really late in life. 17 or so, I would think, and it was during the first semester of engineering college. In a blinding flash of originality, I wrote bullshit poetry about life or some such nonsense. Teenagers are stupid, no?

Your writing has a very obvious Dave Barry-ish turn of phrase. Apart from him, which humour writers have influenced your writing?

Barry’s the writer who taught me all about form, structure and all the other boring nuances that go into great humour writing. Apart from him, I think Charlie Brooker and P J O’Rourke are great fun.

What was your first stand-up comic gig like?

The first time was three years ago, at the open mic organised by Vir Das and company at Blue Frog, called Weirdass Hamateur Night. There were 15 contestants, who got two minutes each. I wrote about being a North Indian or something, and it was the exact opposite of funny and smart. I ran it past a few people before the show, and it still wasn’t funny. I rewrote it the night before and  took copious amounts of drugs before going on stage. People laughed, which was nice of them and ensured that they didn’t get to see a grown man cry on stage. I took part in the next open mic as well, which I won, which bought me more time on stage. It turned out that I liked the spotlight and the instant gratification, so I kept doing it until I went from shit to less shit. At some point, money came in and that wasn’t too bad either. The Comedy Store came here in 2010, and that helped a lot in terms of stage time.

Have you ever had a ‘bad act’, for example where the audience was a bunch of tough customers that didn’t crack a smile all the time you were on stage?

Oh, lots. I’ve walked on to boos, I’ve performed to stony silences, where the only sound you can hear is the sound of your self-esteem being run over by a truck. Corporates usually tend to be tough, because hey, if you’re at a swanky office party, where the booze is free and frankly, above your pay grade, you’re not going to give a sh*t about some ugly dude talking on stage. You have other concerns, such as killing your liver or hitting on that hot chick from HR. As a comic, all you can do is put in every bit of energy and talent that you have, take your money and go home feeling a little bit like a whore. My worst gig was when I was accosted by members of a right-wing fanatic party because they didn’t like a certain joke I had made. I can’t really tell you the joke now, because if they read it, they will set fire to the Internet. It would suffice to say that I was threatened with grievous bodily harm, unless I apologised on stage, so I did, because I like having my limbs attached to my body at all times.

What do you do when you sense your act is not going well?

I wish that I had listened to my mother and worked hard to become one of those corporate types sitting in the audience, not laughing, as opposed to the idiot on stage.

All you can do is to switch your material around in your head, and do stuff that you think might get them laughing. Sometimes heavy or smart stuff is met with a silence, so you try and switch to easier jokes. If all that fails, go home and have a crisis or two.

You write ‘The Week That Wasn’t’. How did you land this assignment? What is it like working with Cyrus and Vijay?

I called Kunal and told him I wanted to write. I set up a meeting, delivered a sample script and a few sexual favours later, I got the job. I have written more than 200 episodes (that’s four-odd years on a weekly) so I know their styles and can write accordingly. That bit is fine – the difficulty lies in being funny and smart every week, about topics that often stay the same. I mean there are only so many Manmohan Singh jokes you can do before you wish that he does acid in Parliament or something, so that you have something new to talk about.

There are very few humour columnists in the city today. How did you break into humour writing for newspapers?

I went to a dance bar. No, seriously. I went to a dance bar because I was fascinated by the whole subculture and wanted to write about it. That experience turned into a 3,000-word piece which sat around gathering dust on my blog, until I felt I wasn’t doing enough in life, so I shot off emails to a bunch of papers. HT was revamping at the time, and they liked the piece. A couple of sample columns later, I was in.

Have you ever received irate letters from readers about any of the columns you’ve written?

Very few irate letters actually. Most people are nice and understanding. That’s probably because a lot of stupid people aren’t reading my column yet. I wonder what will happen when they do. I have gotten some hate on my work about religion and politics, but weirdly enough, the most vitriol I have ever received was after I wrote about how sport fans are stupid and annoying. People take that shit really seriously. It’s hilarious.

When you’re working on material for a stand-up act, what are some of the things you have to keep in mind?

If it’s for a corporate, then you may need to write clean stuff. But that aside, we get to say pretty much what we want. Consistency is difficult, and you always want to write better and funnier than you were writing the day before. A lot of first thoughts need to be thrown out. Apart from that, you just need to have fun writing.

Who, in your opinion, are some of the best stand-up comics in India today? Around the world?

Vir Das. Also, Anuvab Pal is great. As are Rohan Joshi, Tanmay Bhat and Gursimran Khamba. These are guys who set the bar pretty high.

Among the international comics, Louis CK, Chris Rock, Ricky Gervais and Bill Maher are just a few of the guys I look up to.

What advice would you give aspiring stand up comics and humour writers?

Write, write, write, perform, perform, perform, edit, re-write, rehearse, rehearse, rehearse, write, write and write some more. And when you’re not doing that, watch stand-up, listen to stand-up, read, consume and devour as much and as varied content as you can. Do different things, feed your brain, avoid clichés and monotony and be honest. It shows when you are, and more importantly, it shows when you aren’t.

(Pictures courtesy The Comedy Store and Ashish Shakya) 

Exit mobile version